This episode takes Danger 5 to Ilsa’s homeland of Russia, where she and Nikita Kruschev finally sort out their differences. Firstly, though, celebrations are in order after the death of Hitler at the end of last episode. The team are partying at a rock show in Berlin, where a band called Dead Hitler play to the crowd, with the actual dead Hitler propped up in a coffin on stage.
Poor Ilsa can’t quite seem to get in the party mood, as she is still at a loss about Kruschev choosing Holly as his new snow-maiden over her. Complaining to Tucker about it, she thrusts Tucker’s hand onto her butt in order to demonstrate what Kruschev is missing out on. Jackson sees this, and is wildly jealous.
Before things can get too ugly between Jackson and Tucker, Hitler’s face starts to twitch and wink. Covered in ghoulish neon face-paint, Hitler gets all zombie-fied and starts eating people’s brains! Not only him, but several of his henchmen have risen from the grave as well and start wreaking havoc. Hitler summons his ‘Rock Wolf’ from the grave – a gnarly, swastika-shaped, red and black guitar, which Pierre dubs the ‘Nazi-caster’. Rock Wolf is so metal, it can shred holes in the Berlin Wall and blow people’s heads right off their shoulders.
Hitler and his men make for Russia in order to track down Holly. There, they find Kruschev showing his new snow-maiden princess, Holly, around USSR-Land. Kruschev is quick to relinquish Holly when he sees the power of Rock Wolf.
Up in the skies, Danger 5 are piled in a helicopter, making their way to Mother Russia in pursuit of Hitler and his zombie gang, and Holly. At the driver’s seat is Ilsa, who veers slightly off course when she spies Kruschev fleeing back to his palace. She sends her message down to him with missiles.
Seeing Ilsa’s desperation to punish Kruschev, Jackson takes it upon himself to go after the Russian brute himself, hoping it will be his “ticket out of the friend zone.”
Pierre, Mackenzie and Tucker make their way through the USSR-Land carnival, shooting Nazi zombies as they go. In the ‘American House of Horrors’, Mackenzie manages to shoot Zombie Hitler in the head, killing him once again. Unbeknownst to the team, however, Hitler’s spirit seeps out of his double-dead body, entering into a nearby teddy bear.
Elsewhere, Ilsa is fighting zombies on her own, having used a coin charm from her bracelet of wonders to get a machine gun out of a claw-machine game. Zombies are closing in on her, when a chain-smoking, grotty old man comes along with a broom and pokes the zombies away. Wouldn’t you know it, it’s Ilsa’s father!
Mackenzie, Pierre, Tucker and Holly are safe, for now, in a gift shop, but zombies are closing in on them at the boarded-up windows. A few manage to get inside and one bites the severed head of Claire that Tucker is still carrying around with him. Claire’s head goes all zombie crazy and bites Mackenzie’s hand. Mackenzie takes action quickly by ripping his shirt off and vigorously working out, hoping to work the poison out of him. Holly is quite impressed by Mackenzie’s chiselled abs.
Meanwhile, Kruschev has taken Jackson prisoner. Is it just me, or does Jackson find a way to get himself tied up in every episode of this season? He’s almost compromised once again by the zombie of the Vietnamese general who tortured him in ‘Nam, but the bouncy pink ball that Jackson released last episode saves him just in time, as it promised. Jackson fights off some Soviet dance witches before reaching Kruschev, a moment before Ilsa arrives on the scene, having driven there in a souped-up dodgem car with her Dad.
Ilsa tells Jackson to stay out of it. She wants to settle things with Kruschev, who is revealed to be her HUSBAND! Ilsa is determined to show him that he’ll never again have a lover like her. Angrily, she mounts him and starts thrusting away much to Jackson’s horror.
Back in USSR-Land, Tucker and Holly are playing sideshow shooting games. Tucker wins a prize and picks the teddy bear that Hitler has possessed. Holly grabs it and squishes it with cuddles.
Mackenzie is fading fast and instructs Pierre to “play him out.” Tearfully, Pierre takes a sax and starts playing a sombre café jazz sax solo. The teddy winces and, remembering that Hitler hated café jazz, Pierre puts two and two together, working out that Hitler’s spirit is in the bear. Wanting to escape, the teddy convinces Holly to take him to the Russia-coaster.
With Teddy Hitler and Holly in one cart, and Tucker and Pierre on their tail, the four whizz around the Russia-coaster. Teddy Hitler is determined to get up to a particular speed (Back to the Future, anyone?) but the café jazz that Pierre is playing holds him back. Teddy Hitler instructs Holly to look into his eyes, and when she does, his spirit smokes out of the bear and takes over Holly’s body, moustache and all. She gets up to speed in the roller coaster cart and lightnings out of there.
The power of this is enough to melt Kruschev’s face off, with Ilsa remarking “I knew I was good, but that’s never happened before.” Pierre and Tucker catch up with Ilsa and Jackson, filling them in on the fact that Hitler has messed with the space-time continuum, and if they are to catch him, they must go back in time. But not before a delicious cocktail of course.
Next episode looks like it’s going to be a big one, with glimpses of Claire (not just her head), and Season 1 Pierre and Season 2 Pierre coming face to face! This just keeps getting better and better, and this episode was a big splash of neon zombie face paint fun.
Review Score: FIVE STARS (OUT OF FIVE).
Danger 5 screens of SBS 2 and is available on SBS On Demand.
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